I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize