no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
Randomize
