Banned from zoo.
Again?
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
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