remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
