i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
Randomize
