Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
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