no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize
