Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(336): View more from North Carolina

pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.

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(414): View more from Wisconsin

I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"

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(679): View more from Michigan

You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.

(679): View more from Michigan

You really are best friends.

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(613): View more from Ontario

there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.

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(484): View more from Pennsylvania

siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.

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(810): View more from Michigan

hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list

(989): View more from Michigan

haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters

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(850): View more from Florida

He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.

(412): View more from Pennsylvania

And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk

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(320): View more from Minnesota

I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.

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(480): View more from Arizona

The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".

(602): View more from Arizona

It's gonna be a good night

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