Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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