Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
tequila makes me forget i have legs
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Randomize
