remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
Randomize
