I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
We had sex on a dog bed..
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
Randomize
