stop calling my apartment porn island.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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