Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
