oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
I don't usually arrange sex via text message
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
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