Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
