White coat. Heels.
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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