I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
