I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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