everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
Randomize
