im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
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