**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
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