Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
Randomize
