BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
