Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
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