Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
Randomize
