You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
So I'm really hungover walking to work and these douches from comcast on bikes ask if they can take a picture with me to show that they're doing their job. The picture: me, this chick from comcast, i'm holding a 2 ft. pixie stick, a comcast flyer and i'm puking in the parking lot. sounds like their doing a good job!
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
Randomize