Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
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