Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize