what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
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