that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
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