Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
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