I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
