i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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