Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
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