I'm drunk
Is that why you're texting me
Yes
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
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