Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
Randomize