i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
Randomize
