just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize