that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
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