Just woke up wearing a top hat and simpsons boxers. i also found more money in my wallet then what i had before going out, about $1000 more
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
Randomize
