he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
