Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
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