just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Randomize