After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize