you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
Randomize
