Swine flu. Run for my life!
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
Randomize
