She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
Randomize
