I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Randomize