dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
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